Singular They | History, Examples & Use

The “singular they” is a third-person plural pronoun used in the singular form. It’s used when referring to a person whose gender is unknown or irrelevant or when referring to someone who uses “they” as a personal pronoun.

Historically, grammar sticklers have long argued that using “they” as singular was grammatically incorrect. However, many people use “they” as a singular pronoun in formal and informal writing and conversation.

Today, numerous style guides—including AP, APA, MLA, and Chicago—now accept and endorse the use of the singular they. Even dictionaries—including Merriam-Webster and Oxford—accept the use of the singular they as grammatically correct.

Singular they examples
When a person sets goals, they should be specific about them.

If anyone arrives early, tell them they can wait in the lobby.

Singular they for a generic individual

Using the singular they for a generic (i.e., unspecified) person is both common and grammatically correct. It’s also appropriate to use when the gender of the person you’re referring to is unknown or irrelevant.

This use is also referred to as “singular indefinite they.” The “indefinite” aspect refers to the fact that the individual person is undefined (hence, generic or unknown).

Singular indefinite they examples
If someone leaves the house in London without an umbrella, they will probably get soaked in the rain.

We will only consider a candidate for the job if they meet our requirements.

The use of singular they also includes the derivative forms of “they.” These include them, their, theirs, themself, and themselves.

Singular they derivative forms
Form Function Example
them object pronoun Have them call me back when they get a chance.
their possessive adjective The teacher asked the student to hand in their homework.
theirs possessive pronoun The final decision was theirs to make.
themselves reflexive pronoun All of the students referred to themselves in the third person.
themself alternative reflexive pronoun The artist completed the exhibit all by themself.

Singular they for a specific person

Use the singular they when referring to someone who identifies as neither male nor female or otherwise chooses “they/them” as their personal pronouns. This is used as a sign of respect when referring to gender-nonconforming individuals.

Using singular they when referring to a specific person is also called “singular definite they.” The “definite” indicates that the pronoun refers to a specific person.

Singular definite they examples
Taylor said they would meet us at the restaurant at lunchtime.

Charlie left the party because they weren’t feeling well.

They is or they are?

Even though the antecedent (the noun the pronoun refers to) of the singular they is singular, we use the verb “are,” not “is” to maintain subject-verb agreement. This agreement aligns with the traditional grammar rules for “they,” which always takes a plural verb.

That means in standard English, we write “they are,” even when referring to a singular person.

Are with singular they examples
  • The new employee said they are beginning to understand the company culture.
  • Jordan says they are coming to the meeting later.

Some people object to this subject-verb agreement, but “are” is also used correctly when referring to a singular person with the pronoun “you.” For example, it’s correct to say, “You are in good spirits today” (not “you is”).

If you are still not sold on this subject-verb agreement, consider that the contraction “they’re” is correct and commonly used for “they are.” But there’s no such contraction “they’s” for “they is.”

Themself or themselves?

It would make sense, given that the singular they is, well, singular, that we would use “themself” instead of “themselves” when choosing between the reflexive pronouns.

We use “themself” as a reflexive pronoun for a single person who uses “they” as their pronoun. We also traditionally use “themselves” as the reflexive pronoun for plural subjects, but it is often used with the singular “they” in both formal and informal contexts.

Gender-neutral singular reflexive pronoun examples
If anyone needs a break, they should give themselves/themself some time to rest.

The author edited the manuscript themself/themselves to ensure accuracy.

Both versions are grammatically correct, depending on your style guide. Merriam-Webster notes that “themself” is considered “nonstandard” but understands that it is becoming more widely used and accepted.

APA Style accepts both “themself” and “themselves” but considers “themselves” to be more common. When in doubt, use “themselves” for most contexts.

When the sentence is using the plural form, always use “themselves.” If you are referring to someone who uses they/them pronouns, use “themself” the same way you would use “himself” or “herself” for someone who uses he/him or she/her pronouns.

He or she vs they

Historically, many of us have been taught to use “he or she” or “his or her” (or “he/she” or “his/her”) where we now use the singular they.

Most style guides, however, now recommend using the singular they instead of “he or she” for two reasons:

  • Using the singular they instead of “he or she” is more concise and easier to read. This is particularly true when “he or she” is used more than once in a sentence.
  • Some people use the preferred pronouns “they/them” because they identify as neither male nor female. Using “he or she” in this instance is considered misgendering someone and disrespectful.

For the two reasons above, we also suggest using the singular they in place of “he or she” (or “he/she”).

He or she vs they examples
  • Each participant must sign the form before they can join the event.
  • Each participant must sign the form before he or she can join the event.

The effective use of the singular they becomes even more clear when a sentence contains two or more uses of it instead of “he or she” (or he/she).

He or she vs they examples
  • If a student finishes their exam early, they should check their answers before they turn it in.
  • If a student finishes his or her exam early, he or she should check his or her answers before he or she turns it in.

It vs they

“Neuter pronouns” refer to pronouns that do not imply gender. The most common neuter pronoun in English is “it.” It’s correct to call an inanimate object “it,” as in “The book on the nightstand is very long, but it sounds very interesting!”

However, it is disrespectful and dehumanizing to refer to a person as “it” and should be avoided at all costs.

You can use the neuter pronoun “it” when referring to inanimate objects, places, ideas or concepts, or animals (although we often use “he,” “she,” or “they” when referring to pets).

It vs they examples
  • If a student needs more time to complete their project, they should ask the professor.
  • If a student needs more time to complete their project, it should ask the professor.

Singular they history

The Oxford English Dictionary cites the poem William and the Werewolf (translated from French to English in 1375) as the first recorded use of the singular they. And speaking of Williams, Shakespeare used the singular they in Hamlet, written in 1599.

By the 18th and 19th centuries, however, grammarians began suggesting using “he” as the pronoun of choice for unknown genders. This was suggested on the basis that English should follow the Latin norms and use masculine pronouns when referring to someone, even when their gender is unknown or irrelevant.

By the 1970s and 1980s, societal shifts in traditional gender roles took place. There was a newfound interest in questioning the use of “he” as the pronoun of choice when referring to a person of unknown gender. The feminist movement proposed we begin to use the singular they (instead of “he”) in these contexts to fight gender bias in language.

In the early 2000s, discussions around gender-nonconforming and nonbinary people created a surge in the use of the singular they. In 2019, Merriam-Webster named “they” as the word of the year, specifically referencing its use when referring to people who identify as nonbinary or gender-nonconforming.

It wasn’t always without controversy, but the use of the singular they has been around for centuries, both in formal and informal writing and conversation. Today, many style guides both accept and endorse the use of the singular they for referring to someone whose gender is unknown or irrelevant, as well as for someone who uses “they/them” as personal pronouns.

Frequently asked questions about singular they

Is they singular or plural?

They has been traditionally used as a plural pronoun, but it can be either singular or plural depending on the context.

The singular they can be used when referring to someone whose gender is unknown or irrelevant, as well as someone who identifies as nonbinary, gender-nonconforming, or otherwise uses “they/them” personal pronouns.

For example, “If a customer has any questions, they can ask the staff.”

Is them singular or plural?

“Them” can be either singular or plural and, like the singular they, it is used to refer to someone when gender is unknown or irrelevant or to refer to a nonbinary person who uses “they/them” personal pronouns.

For example, “If a student misses a class, let them know they can come to office hours.”

Is themself or themselves singular?

Both “themselves” and “themself” can be used with the singular they. “Themselves” tends to be more widely accepted, especially for style guides, but “themself” has become more common in the English language.

For example, “Justin helped themself/themselves to another serving of dinner.”

Is their singular or plural?

The possessive adjective “their” is technically plural. Thus, it is most frequently used to indicate possession by a plural noun (e.g., “Tony and Kyra brought their children on vacation”). 

However, “their” is also acceptable as a replacement for the singular possessive adjectives “his” or “her” in several circumstances: when the gender of the possessor is unknown, when the possessor identifies as nonbinary, or when a general category of people is being referred to (e.g., “Each student should submit their own work”).

Using “their” as a singular possessive adjective is typically preferred to using the phrase “his or her” or using “his” in a general sense. “Their” has long been used in this way in speech, and it is now acceptable in writing as well.

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Ryan Cove, BA

Ryan has a BA in psychology, focusing on industrial/organizational psychology and neuroscience. He has spent the last five years writing and editing online blog content on a wide variety of topics.